However, the past 2 years I have taken a different initiative towards dating. After becoming single after a 4 and 1/2 year relationship I watch how the average Mormon girl went on dates... and it was the same thing, different guy.
A lot of us females were/ still are living in a Disney fairytale and waiting for the guy to do the work to win our hearts. Now although it's charming when they do, I have a different idea about it all, which some may not agree with, some say they agree with but don't do it, and 1% of y'all are actually with me and do live by it.
Here is my outlook... I believe everything is 50/50. (For example, if I want my future spouse to be a worthy man and someone who reads his scriptures daily then I better be a worthy woman and read my scriptures daily. No hypocrisy, got it?) If you want equality in the relationship then show it in the dating process. Meaning, he shouldn't be the one asking you out all the time, he shouldn't be coming up with aaalll the activities and meal plans, etc. Although some guys can do all this, wouldn't it be a nice curve ball to send their way if you planned a date once in awhile? How much more attractive would you be?! ;)
I have felt bad for the pressure the male population gets to ask a girl out, make the first move, pick up on our confusing hints, plan the date, etc.! They, like us females, are just as nervous, and probably dislike doing it sooo often.
So... PUT THE BALL IN YOUR COURT!
And here is my challenge and date ideas for you!
1. NO HEAD GAMES! Being vague is cute when you're in high school, and trying to see if he is psychic is a waste of time. If you're wanting to hang out, ASK! If you want your door open, SAY! If you're waiting for him to call/text you first you'll be waiting... and waiting. DO IT!... Stop the eye cues and silent treatments.
2. NO TEXT OVERLOAD! Oh my heavens I am guilty of this too! I think some of us females love to talk, so we therefore think so does the male population! haha
You need to leave mystery. Don't include every detail of your day unless asked, cause truthfully, sometimes it's too much. Make it seem like you have a life (even if you don't!) besides texting him.
3. YOU'RE NOT EXCLUSIVE! And lastly, just because the date went great and he seemed interested DOES NOT, I repeat, DOES NOT mean you are now exclusively seeing him. If I have learned anything about guys, (and trust me, I have grown up with 3 males and been around my dad's basketball team for the past 15 years), it's that they do a fabulous job of keeping their female relationships separate and not letting you know they could possibly be talking to someone else as well. So if they are going to enjoy the dating field, so should YOU!
Now that may not be the reason to you came to read this, but I wanted the next part to be used for only those who were going to use these dates and be SUCCESSFUL. Which means the top 3 things above cannot happen while using my date ideas. haha :)
Date Ideas & More!!!!
(Disclaimer** The key to success is preparation, ask him out properly, creativity, and preparation!)
KEY:
I've done this idea and it's been great!
Haven't used it so don't know it's success!
1. Roll the die!
On this date my friend said it was a lot of fun, and super creative! So I'm sure yours will too.
For this date you will need to prepare two different outcomes for a dinner, an activity, a movie, and dessert. Here is a pic of how I asked him out!
I did... Dinner: Go out to eat (with a resturaunt already chosen) OR go back to your place and make a meal together (with the dinner meal already chosen)
Example: I had a restaurant in mind, so if he rolled an odd number we went out to eat, if he rolled an even we went to my place and made dinner.
Activity: play glow in the dark mini golf inside OR go out to the top of mountain and hit glow in the dark gold balls off there!
Movie: Stay in and watch a movie OR go out and watch a movie. (Note I had movies in mind for both outcomes!)
Dessert: Something warm (like pie) OR something cold (like ice cream)
2. Let's Tee Off?!
For this one I didn't go on a date cause it was an awkward fail, but the approach and idea was successful. I knew he was a golf fan from asking around and little comments he made, so I got a bag of old golf balls, wrote a letter on each ball individually, and together made a message. The message was "Hey _ _ _ _! Let's tee off? -Brit (505) 888-8888" I put all the balls in a bag, delivered it to his house on the door, with a his name on the bag, ding-dong ditched, and let him unscramble the message....
I definitely got a call back! ;)
And if things didn't go south the date was to go golfing and have him "show me the ropes". haha
3. Hot Chocolate in July?
So when conversing with a guy and he happens to be sarcastic I like to play off such things, and remember things he says. For instance, it was the July and this guy told me how he wanted a cup of hot chocolate. I thought it was bizarre, and he was actually being a goofball about it. So knowing that he was joking but wanting to make a cute move I decided to buy him a cup of hot chocolate at the nearest gas station and tied it up with a ribbon and bow, attaching a note that said "To: _ _ _ _ _ From: Brit". I then took it over to his house, left it on the front step, rang the door bell, and left!
That was it!
An hour latter he came over with that cup of hot chocolate, drinking it, and asked me to a date that weekend.
4. Backwoods Girl!
So I love the outdoors, ESPECIALLY in summertime. I also love romance and a pick-up truck. I have always wanted to combine the two. So plan an evening date! You need a pick-up, blankets, pillows, and some type of easy dinner to eat outdoors. (If you are like me and want a quiet, fun, intimate evening, I would bring fishing poles, bait, and a bag and pocket knife incase y'all do catch something!)
My preference would be to fish together before sundown, and when the sun starts to set, set up the back of the pick-up truck as a massive lounging area. Eat dinner there and just have a relaxing evening under the stars!... **(Better yet! If you or your date like to shoot gun and have access you could replace that for fishing.) *** (If you have time to properly ask him out you can get a stick, string, and draw and cut out a fish and attach it to the string and stick to make it look like a fishing pole. Write on the fish this youtube link, with a question mark on the other side, and have him guess what the date is!)... Cute right?!
5. Movie and Dinner!
I am not a fan in a first, second, or third date being dinner and a movie. First off, because it's cliche and doesn't take much effort to plan. Secondly, it's hard to get to know each other during a movie. So this date idea is for those who already know each other and want something a little different yet relaxing.
This is another outdoorsy good weather kind of date. For this one I did it in my back yard with a guy who I had dated before, so it wasn't awkward. haha Lay a big, nice comfy blanket on the grass. I bought some cute glass lanterns of different colors at the Dollar Tree, along with some LED candles for them. I set up the lanterns with the candles in them so that it made a zig-zagish run way from the back door to the blanket on the lawn. I also prepared a homemade dinner. (I cooked a dish of mine that was his favorite and made a dessert.) Be mindful of what he likes and prepare the meal around him! After everything was set up I went and picked him up. (It's cute if you do! ;) haha) When we got back we had dinner on the blanket and watched our favorite movie on my laptop.
Although the date my sound cheesy, it's a different take on the typical dinner and a movie date, and the guy will appreciate that you went all out and even put an intimate twist on it! :)
6. Bingo!
For this date I got a little more creative. I asked the guy out by making my own bingo card. In each spot I wrote a word that completed the message to asking him out. The words went in order, and after I wrote a word in each slot I covered each spot individually with a little piece of paper and on those papers put numbers. (So it looked like a bingo sheet). I left the sheet with him and told him not to uncover them until I gave him the order in which to uncover them. Throughout the day I texted him things like B7 or N3. He would then uncover the message little by little... He said yes to the date. :)
NOW! On the date we played a bingo scavenger hunt against another couple. We had different tasks on the card we had to complete before the other couple but we had to document it, and like in bingo we had to get 4 in a row to win! :)
7. Breaking the Ice!
So I started talking to a guy and wanted to make a move, and "break the ice". I got a sticky note and wrote "I just wanted us to "Break the Ice" :) Brittany". I put the not in a sandwich ziploc bag and sealed it well. I then placed the bag into an empty 2 liter coke bottle I had. I took off the coke wrapper and filled the bottle with water to the top and closed it tight. I then put it in the freezer to freeze. After it was frozen I attached a bow and delivered it to him and left him to retrieve the note. He thought it was really funny, and it definitely broke the ice ;)
8. Glow in the Dark Games!
For this one you need 10 empty plastic, clear water bottles. (Like the ones that come in packs at walmart or sam's club). You will also need glow sticks. Crack the glow sticks right before the date and place them in the water bottles and fill with water. (These are your pins!) Get a small ball. (Something like a dodgeball or sort). Use it was your bowling ball. Go to a park or somewhere where you'd like to bowl and do it in the dark. Once your done bowling and having a friendly competition, you can switch over to the next night activity. Get kites and bring glow in the dark paint and anything else you may need to put on the paint or activate it (i.e. brushes or a flash light!). Sit down, talk, paint you kites. and when ready take them for a good soar! It's be cool to see the glow in dark just waving in the sky! :)
9. Childhood Fun!
This one brings out your inner kid and playful side. I love this type of date cause it makes you feel young and you can have cool childhood memory conversations along with it. For the date your dinner will be your favorite cereal. The activity is childhood games. Chutes and Ladders, Hungry Hippo, Kerplunk, Connect Four, Battelship, etc.! It's a light hearted evening and focused on pure fun!
Lastly... all these dates can be altered and changed specifically for the guy you are planning it for. And they should be! Make him feel like a king and he will treat you like a QUEEN! Isn't that what we secretly all want! ;) haha
So I love the outdoors, ESPECIALLY in summertime. I also love romance and a pick-up truck. I have always wanted to combine the two. So plan an evening date! You need a pick-up, blankets, pillows, and some type of easy dinner to eat outdoors. (If you are like me and want a quiet, fun, intimate evening, I would bring fishing poles, bait, and a bag and pocket knife incase y'all do catch something!)
My preference would be to fish together before sundown, and when the sun starts to set, set up the back of the pick-up truck as a massive lounging area. Eat dinner there and just have a relaxing evening under the stars!... **(Better yet! If you or your date like to shoot gun and have access you could replace that for fishing.) *** (If you have time to properly ask him out you can get a stick, string, and draw and cut out a fish and attach it to the string and stick to make it look like a fishing pole. Write on the fish this youtube link, with a question mark on the other side, and have him guess what the date is!)... Cute right?!
5. Movie and Dinner!
I am not a fan in a first, second, or third date being dinner and a movie. First off, because it's cliche and doesn't take much effort to plan. Secondly, it's hard to get to know each other during a movie. So this date idea is for those who already know each other and want something a little different yet relaxing.
This is another outdoorsy good weather kind of date. For this one I did it in my back yard with a guy who I had dated before, so it wasn't awkward. haha Lay a big, nice comfy blanket on the grass. I bought some cute glass lanterns of different colors at the Dollar Tree, along with some LED candles for them. I set up the lanterns with the candles in them so that it made a zig-zagish run way from the back door to the blanket on the lawn. I also prepared a homemade dinner. (I cooked a dish of mine that was his favorite and made a dessert.) Be mindful of what he likes and prepare the meal around him! After everything was set up I went and picked him up. (It's cute if you do! ;) haha) When we got back we had dinner on the blanket and watched our favorite movie on my laptop.
Although the date my sound cheesy, it's a different take on the typical dinner and a movie date, and the guy will appreciate that you went all out and even put an intimate twist on it! :)
6. Bingo!
For this date I got a little more creative. I asked the guy out by making my own bingo card. In each spot I wrote a word that completed the message to asking him out. The words went in order, and after I wrote a word in each slot I covered each spot individually with a little piece of paper and on those papers put numbers. (So it looked like a bingo sheet). I left the sheet with him and told him not to uncover them until I gave him the order in which to uncover them. Throughout the day I texted him things like B7 or N3. He would then uncover the message little by little... He said yes to the date. :)
NOW! On the date we played a bingo scavenger hunt against another couple. We had different tasks on the card we had to complete before the other couple but we had to document it, and like in bingo we had to get 4 in a row to win! :)
7. Breaking the Ice!
So I started talking to a guy and wanted to make a move, and "break the ice". I got a sticky note and wrote "I just wanted us to "Break the Ice" :) Brittany". I put the not in a sandwich ziploc bag and sealed it well. I then placed the bag into an empty 2 liter coke bottle I had. I took off the coke wrapper and filled the bottle with water to the top and closed it tight. I then put it in the freezer to freeze. After it was frozen I attached a bow and delivered it to him and left him to retrieve the note. He thought it was really funny, and it definitely broke the ice ;)
For this one you need 10 empty plastic, clear water bottles. (Like the ones that come in packs at walmart or sam's club). You will also need glow sticks. Crack the glow sticks right before the date and place them in the water bottles and fill with water. (These are your pins!) Get a small ball. (Something like a dodgeball or sort). Use it was your bowling ball. Go to a park or somewhere where you'd like to bowl and do it in the dark. Once your done bowling and having a friendly competition, you can switch over to the next night activity. Get kites and bring glow in the dark paint and anything else you may need to put on the paint or activate it (i.e. brushes or a flash light!). Sit down, talk, paint you kites. and when ready take them for a good soar! It's be cool to see the glow in dark just waving in the sky! :)
9. Childhood Fun!
This one brings out your inner kid and playful side. I love this type of date cause it makes you feel young and you can have cool childhood memory conversations along with it. For the date your dinner will be your favorite cereal. The activity is childhood games. Chutes and Ladders, Hungry Hippo, Kerplunk, Connect Four, Battelship, etc.! It's a light hearted evening and focused on pure fun!
Lastly... all these dates can be altered and changed specifically for the guy you are planning it for. And they should be! Make him feel like a king and he will treat you like a QUEEN! Isn't that what we secretly all want! ;) haha
But most importantly always be yourself!
Your date can be awesome, but it's you he should be geared towards.
Have fun ladies, and may the odds be ever in your favor!
